Deadpool Breaks the Internet
by Venom-In-Florida
Summary: Deadpool invades other universes to cause MAYHEM! Rated T for language. Review to vote on his next world!
1. Chapter 1: Deadpool Murders Ponies

**Ello, fans! So, i have not been dead, I've just been grounded from electronics, but I'm ungrounded now, and to celebrate, I'm starting a new story, Deadpool Breaks the Internet! It's about Deadpool entering the internet, because he can do that for some reason, and he travels to other movies, shows, video games and comics. To start, he will invade My Little Pony and wreak havoc. Enjoy, and vote the next place in the reviews!**

_As Deadpool looked around at where the hell he was, he felt a strange presence of overall excessive happiness and friendliness. _

"Holy- where am I?! Eddie! Fix this!"

_I cannot. You must do that yourself, Deadpool._

"Well dammit, guess it's up to me to fix this problem."

_As he started the long journey back the the real world, he found a little rustic town._

"Oh goodie, maybe I can find someone to torture mercilessly... wait, I'm the good guy now. Da-"

_He was cut off by a pony, as you can probably tell._

"Yeah, I noticed, genius."

_ It was bubblegum pink all over, including its hair and tail._

"HOLY SHIT, IT WANTS TO YIFF ME! DIE, FREAK OF NATURE!"

_He whipped out his handgun and shot it several times until he ran out of bullets._

"Whew, close one. Ma always told me to watch out for those. They could be _anywh-"_

_Yet another oddly colored pony had spotted him, this time with pee-yellow skin and a pink hair and tail._

"Oh, Pinky Pie, what happened? Speak to me! PLEASE! Who did this to you?!"

"Oh, this? This was me. Wait... if this is Pinky pie, a strangely colored horse, then you're... FLUTTERSHY! OH MY GOD! NOT MY LITTLE PONY! I MUST PURGE THIS TOWN OF YOUR PRESENCE! DIE, YOU ABYSMAL, CURSED FREAKS OF NATURE!"

_More ponies had arrived by now, sending Deadpool into a panic._

"DAMN RIGHT I'M PANICKED! I DON'T WANT TO DIE HERE! I'LL KILL THEM ALL! GBLARGH!"

_He whipped out two assault rifles and started shooting at anything that moved._

"THIS'LL TEACH YOU TO EXIST! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

_After 2 minutes, anything living within a one-mile radius around lay on the ground in a dead, mangled heap around him._

"Phew, close one. Almost died. Now, where was I? Oh, yeah, finding a way home. AUTHOR! FIX THIS! OR ELSE! Also, some coffee would be nice.

_I give it to him with the power of writing._

"Ah yes, good boy. Now, please send me home."

_The rustic village disappeared, leaving him in a blank white place with a magnifying glass to the right._

"Wait... this isn't my apartment in New York... ah. My old enemy. THE GOOGLE HOMEPAGE."

**TO BE CONTINUED**

**Hope you liked that. Where should he go next in his (desperate) mission to get home? Will it be...**

**1: Littlest Pet Shop**

**2: Naruto**

**3: Harry Potter**

**Comment where he should go next!**


	2. Chapter 2: Deadpool slaughters Naruto

**I hath returned to this story! Here's chapter 2. Since nobody voted, I decided on Naruto. Enjoy.**

"_I_ sure as hell won't enjoy it. I hate Naruto. Always have. Now, let's get this sh-"

_You can't keep swearing all the time. You went wayyyy over the limit in the last chapter. Unless you want me to make an innocent dog or cat or something die, you need to tone it down._

_"_You don't have the guts to kill off an animal character unless it's ugly or evil and you know it."

_Good point. Then I'll have to deny you of food._

"Alright, fine, I'll keep a muzzle on the swearing. When can I use my one f-bomb?"

_When you decide. But you only get ONE._

_"_Great! Now let's get this over with."

_Deadpool closed his eyes, reopening them when the all-white environment changed into a path heading into a nearby forest. The sun was shining, a small group was walking toward him slowly, and he felt at peace._

_The whole thing just SCREAMED anime._

_He turned his head toward the group, and the arrogant asshole himself, Naruto. Along with his weaksauce groupies._

_He silently and sneakily pulled out a revolver,_ "Really? A revolver?" _Yes, a revolver. They're easy to conceal. "_Fair enough."_ He pulled out a revolver and walked towards the group._ "Greetings, freaks. I am Deadpool, the Merc with a Mouth, and I am here not by my own will." _The groups leader (and only adult) stepped forward and said, "_Hello, Deadpool. Let me introduce myself. I am Ka-" _Deadpool whipped up the revolver "_Let's call it the 'I-Don't-Careinator," _fine. Anyway, he whipped it up and shot the leader dead in the forehead, blowing his damn brains all over the place. _

"Don't care, nerd. Now, to tend to the little ones." _He turned menacingly to the three children, put away the I-Don't-Careinator, and slowly pulled out a handgun with a spade on the handle._

_"_Naruto and friends, say hello to the ACE OF SPADES, you little bitches!" _He yelled in a French accent. H__e shot them all repeatedly until the ammo clip was emptied. At this point, thanks to the power of the Ace of Spades, they all lay in unrecognizable piles of blood and flesh. _

"Now that THAT'S taken care of, would you mind giving me some ramen?"

_I give it to him with the Power of Writing!  
_

_He swallowed it quickly, threw the bowl behind him, and dissolved into nothing as he was taken back to the Google homepage. He saw, in the searchbar, the words, _**"Littlest Pet Shop, Harry Potter, or Lilo and Stitch?" **_He turns to face you, the reader, and asks an important question:_

"Well? Which one? Comment on Chapter 2 where I need to go next, or you won't get any more chapters!"


	3. Chapter 3: Deadpool Shoots Aliens Dead

**Sorry this chapter is a bit late, I moved yesterday and didn't have time after class to write. Here's chapter 3, which is Lilo and Stitch due to a vote on Chapter 2. Anyway, shoutout to N8100T4907H for voting! Anyway, here we go. **

"I hope that this "Lilo and Stitch" person has decent chimichangas. I'm starving after brutally slaughtering those dumbass kids."

_That's one, Deadpool. _

"Shhhhhhhh...oot. You're right."

_I know. Now, keep it cool and good._

"Ah, yes. Enslaved irony."

_Precisely. Now, let me explain Lilo and Stitch. Basically, an alien escapes captivity and lands on Earth, where a lonely little girl "adopts" him and eventually they become best friends and stuff. Blah, blah, blah, big battle, the alien gets to stay with the girl, and they live happily ever after until the next 3 movies and the TV show. _

"Sounds like a typical Disney franchise. Anyway, at what point in time am I?"

_The first movie, but I'll leave it to you to figure out when._

"Fair enough. Now, _WHERE_ am I?"

_Hawaii. Where the movies take place (mostly)._

"Ooooh, so like pineapple cocktails and thousands of coconuts and stuff?"

_Stereotypical, but yes, that Hawaii. Anyway, he started walking. It was dark (around midnight), he was hungry, and it was humid outside. _

_"_I hate humidity. When-"

_He reached a medium-sized town by the beach._

_"_Sweet, beach town!"

_Yeah, beach town. Anyway, he strolled through the town like he owned it. There was no one around, but he could hear loud music from what looked like a tourist resort. He poked his head through one of the holes in the fence, saw a bunch of people dancing like idiots, and decided he didn't want to stick around this area. _

_"_Damn right I don't." _That's two._ "Shut the frick up."

_He continued walking until he reached a nice, open area several yards from a road. He sat down and began to contemplate life when a giant freaking meteor landed right in front of him... only it was bright red and made of smooth metal._

_Meanwhile, a couple miles away, a little girl and her sister saw it crashing down. The younger one screeched, "_A shooting star! I call it! Get out, I have to make a wish!" _After shoving her sister out the door, the little one knelt and prayed, "_Please send someone to be my friend. Maybe an angel... The nicest angel you have..." _Her sister listened and made a silent decision._

_Meanwhile back at the crash, a small, blue, four armed creature crawled out, said something unintelligible, and laughed maniacally. It started to crawl down, but Deadpool scooped it up and said, _"Holy fricking frick, you're adorable! I think I'll name you, "Stitch," like this movie!" _It struggled but could not break free, and gave up. "_Perfect, now let's get you somewhere safe from the stupid tourists."

_The next day, Deadpool woke up to find Stitch gone. "_No! Not my new friend! Where did he go?!"

_While Deadpool was screeching madly, Stitch was sneaking away. He didn't expect to be caught by two more aliens: a large, purple, foureyed one, and a skinny, green, three legged oneeyed one. "_We got him! Haha!" _The purple one cackled in a Russian accent._ "Call the Councilwoman. I'm getting my lab back..." _Deadpool suddenly appeared, seeing them with his new friend in handcuffs, and pulled out an assault rifle called, "Hard Light," and proceeded to rain gunfire on the two aliens holding Stitch._

_A minute later, all that remained was Deadpool and Stitch, who looked like he was going to have a heart attack and throw up at the same time. Deadpool stood panting, until he composed himself and picked up Stitch, who was having a panic attack_. "There, those mean, scary other aliens are dead and won't hurt you anymore." _He picked the handcuff locks and released Stitch._ "Now, my furry, blue little friend, go wreak havoc and be freeeeeee!"

_Stitch stopped his panic attack, saluted Deadpool, and ran off into the jungle cackling._

_Deadpool wiped an imaginary tear from his face._ "They grow up so fast. Now, gimme a cocktail." _I give it to him grudgingly._

"Perfect. Now, take me awaaaaaaaaaay!"

_He dissolved into nothing as he was taken back to the Google homepage. He saw, in the searchbar, the words, _"Littlest Pet Shop, Harry Potter, or Fortnite?" _He turns to face you, the reader, and asks an important question:_

"Well? Which one, nerds? Comment on Chapter 3 where I need to go next, or no more chapters!"


	4. Chapter 4: Deadpool Wrecks Triwizard Cup

**Sorry this one is so late, no excuse. I'm just lazy and lost track of time. Anyway, read, review and have a blessed day, and vote on where he goes in Chapter 5! Since no one voted on the last chapter, I decided on ****Harry Potter. For options, I'm keeping a theme of tv show****/book****, movie, and video game now. ****Vote on the next chapter's universe in the comments! Also, I have a Tumblr now. PM me for the location.****Hope you like it! ****Here we goooo!**

"What the hell is 'Harry Potter?' Some kind of pot-"

_I'm gonna stop you right there. I'm ok with mild sexual stuff and language, but ABSOLUTELY NO DRUG OR SMOKING REFERENCES OR YOUR TALKING PRIVILEGES WILL BE SUSPENDED. Got it?_

_"_Fine. But seriously, what IS Harry Potter?"

_A great book series about wizards made into semi-mediocre movies. I'm putting you in the books, specifically Book 4, during the Wizard Hunger Games. They called it the "Triwizard Tournament," but its pretty much a Wizard Hunger Games. Anyway, here you go. Your job is to warn Harry, who I will point out for you, from touching the dadgum Triwizard Cup. Good luck. _

_"_Gee, thanks, 'Venom'. I don't even-"

_He suddenly found himself in a maze made of bushes, at near-sunset. _

"Thanks for the situation."

It_ felt peaceful and calming... all too much, in relation to what I told him earlier. _

_He heard voices. They both sounded male, around teenagehood. Deadpool looked around a corner that was conveniently placed near him and saw two boys with their backs turned to him: One was stringbeany, with longish black hair, and the other was more athletic looking, with medium-length brown hair. They were looking at a large, golden trophy that Deadpool's kleptomaniac instincts were itching to grab and take for himself. He then remembered that the whole reason he was here was so that he could stop these teenagers from touching the "Dadgum" trophy. _

_He whipped out the Ace of Spades and used his sudden awesome pinpoint accuracy to shoot the trophy just before they touched it. They turned around and stared, slackjawed, in fear and awe. They didn't know who he was, but they knew that if he shot the trophy with a gun (only Harry knew what this was) inches from their hands, he was a force to be reckoned with._

_To tell the truth, he only had that accuracy because it was an easy plot device and a one time thing._

"Hey! Seriously? A one time thing?"_ Maybe I'll do it again some other chapter, but for this one, it's a one time thing. Now, shut it. "_Fine."

_He stowed the Ace of Spades as the two teens looked at him, gawking, and wondered if he was going to shoot them next or he just wanted the Cup. He sauntered over, pushed them aside several feet, and using the magic of writing and convenient plot devices, pulled out a rocket launcher with the words, "Bad Omens," written on it._

_He took aim at the Cup and fired a rocket right at the center. The Cup exploded on impact, showering bits and pieces of gold everywhere and causing the two teens to look away in fear. Deadpool just stared at the havoc and laughed hysterically._

_When the gold stopped raining and Deadpool stopped laughing, Harry and Cedric looked back at him, now cleaning his rocket launcher on the grass. _"'Sup, homies? I just saved this," _at the word "this" he pointed at Cedric,_ "kid's life. Now, are you happy or what?"

_Harry didn't know what to make of this claim, but held his wand behind his back and said,_ "Thanks, Mister... I don't know your name?"

_Deadpool decided to be sincere for once and replied,_ "The name's Pool. Deadpool. Now, I need to find your leader. Where is he?"

_Harry decided to trust him because I made him, and said,_ "Hold on, let me get Professor Dumbledore." _He summoned his Firebolt, flew off, and came back with Dumbledore riding on another broom. Dumbledore strode up to Deadpool and said, "_Excuse me, Mr. Pool, young Harry tells me that you saved his and Cedric here's lives?"

_Deadpool saw an opportunity to make himself seem cooler than he was and told them the whole story that I just put in his brain to make it easier, adding a lot of points about how he trudged several miles just to find them and save them. Eventually, he ended after describing what would have happened in the next three books had he not shown up. _

_After he ended, Dumbledore processed this information and said, "_So, you mean to tell me that if they had grabbed the Triwizard Cup, they would have been teleported to a graveyard and Cedric would have been murdered, then Voldemort would have taken Harry's blood to return to a fleshly form and caused mass havoc and evil?"

_Deadpool nodded, took a sip from the cup of chamomile he pulled out of nowhere, and said,_ "Correct, my good boomer. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to leave. My next adventure's calling me."

_I pull him out of Harry Potter and back into the Google searchbar, where the words ,_ _"_Littlest Pet Shop, Alien, or Fortnite?_" He turns to face you, the reader, and asks an important question:_

"Well? Which one, kids? Comment on Chapter 5 where I need to go next, or no more chapters! I mean it this time!"


	5. Chapter 5: Deadpool Slaughters Fortnite

**Here is Chapter 5 of Deadpool Breaks the Internet! Enjoy. It's Fortnite so he can wreck it, because it sucks. Enjoy!**

**"**What the hell is 'Fortnite?'"

_A sweaty, salty copycat game filled with 9 year olds so cussy, sweaty and salty they're made of seawater._

"Oh. I see. So it's a video game?"

_I just said that but yeah. Now, my beautiful stolen creation, go forth and wreak havoc on the nine year olds. _

_Deadpool saluted and said, "_Yes, sir!"

_He vanished from Google and reappeared in a simple valley... except it was filled with broken, abandoned buildings and it was starting to rain virgins._

_Deadpool looked around in disgust and said, _"This sucks. Let's ruin some virgins' lives."

_He whipped out the Ace of Spades and took cover in an abandoned restaurant. Fortunately, no one had seen him. _

_He waited for a moment before peeking out over the counter he was hiding behind and saw a box with a plus sign on it. _"Perfect,"_ he said, and grinned._

_Moments later, a person dressed as a giant, pink bear walked in carrying a shotgun and saw the box. Before they could open it, however, Deadpool shot him in the head with the Ace. _"Nice! Headshot!" _he whispered to himself._

_About 20 minutes later, 75% of the players were dead and wondering why no one had acquired any points. The infamous YouTuber Ninja, who was usually the winner by now, corralled the remaining players together. He spoke up, _"_Has anyone gotten a kill yet?"_

_No one responded. This confirmed Ninja's suspicions of either a hacker or a new champion so good, he had wiped out three quarters of the players before anyone else could get a kill. He spoke again, _"_Ok, listen up. Look around for anyone who may be hiding, or not here. I'm sending you all a list of the usernames of people left alive. If you see anyone not on the list, let me know where they then immediately try to kill them. I'm giving a reward to anyone to kills them. Got it?_"

_Everyone murmured with excitement and broke off into either small groups or solo runners to find this mysterious pro._

_Meanwhile, in a tree not far away, the pro in question laughed. _"They think they can kill me? I'm the main character! Let's see how well they do against me and the Ace of Spades..."

_10 minutes after Ninja had sent everyone off, the list of living players had been slowly diminishing. No one had reported to him, but only 14 out of the 24 people he sent out remained. He wondered why everyone was dying when he heard a crackle from one of his teammates, "Ninja! I see him! His name's 'Deadpool,' and he's wearing a red and black leather suit. He's holding a black hand gun with white stripes and a white ace on the handle and barrel. I think he's... oh, God, he's looking at me! Ninja, he's in the abandoned tower, top floor! Come kill him, before-"_

_His audio cut out after a short scream and a gunshot. The radio crackled again and a new voice spoke from it, _"Whaddup, nerd? I'm coming for you, too, after I finish killing all of your cronies. Be prepared to pee yourself!"_ A crunch and a crackle was heard, then the radio went dead._

_Ninja was starting to panic, despite this being just a retarded game. He called into his radio, "Everyone report back to base! He's coming for us, and I want us to be ready." _

_Several people confirmed, but after checking the list again, Ninja found only 9 people alive, and himself. He was worried that someone would finally steal his record..._

_Meanwhile, Deadpool heard what was going on and prepared himself for battle (AKA a brutal slaughter). He checked the Ace of Spades, pulled out the Riskrunner, and readied his Tractor Cannon with a full cassette (I know they're not actually cassettes but that's what they remind me of. Also, I know you can't use more than one exotic weapon, but he's DEADPOOL)._

_He snuck around until he was within sight of the base of Ninja and his cronies, seeing them crowded around a fortification made of brick and wood. He smiled to himself and fired a shot from the Ace at one of the walls._

_He heard whispered voices frantically shushing and someone came out from the other side of the building. He looked around in the general direction of where Deadpool was hiding before being shot in the face with the Ace and vanishing._

_Deadpool called out, "_Anyone else want to mess with me? Anyone? Come on out!"

_He heard Ninja say, "That's him! hurry, get him!"_

_Deadpool smirked, relishing the thought of what he was about to do._

_The wall he was facing exploded, and everyone left inside burst out, running and shooting in every direction... except where Deadpool was. He switched to the Riskrunner and mowed down everyone, taking care not to kill Ninja. He did, however, hit him a few times to weaken him._

_After everyone was dead, he looked at Ninja with disgust. He sauntered over to him, looked him in the eye, and said, "_How does it feel to have your victory torn from your hands, bitch?"

_Ninja couldn't understand why Deadpool was so intent on killing him. Wasn't this just a game? _

_Deadpool chuckled to himself and took aim at Ninja's head with the Ace of Spades._ "It isn't just a game. It's a central hub for cussy nine year olds and losers like you to waste their time on a retarded game with no originality. It ruins everything it touches, and it's a stain on humanity."

_Deadpool pulled the trigger and dusted off his hands. _"Another day, another God-awful world destroyed. Now, Mr. Narrator slash writer, get me outta here with a hot beverage!"

_I give him a Hot Chocolate through the Power of Writing. He took a sip and said, _"Beautiful."

_He reappeared in the Google homepage where the words, _"Littlest Pet Shop, Alien, or Destiny 2?_" He turns to look at you, the reader, and says, "_Well? Which one, guys? Comment or no more chapters! I mean it this time!"


End file.
